Commit to Self: The journey to my first fitness competition- May 20th, 2012

Well, here it is as promised, information on my journey to my first fitness competition. I am going to provide full disclosure and honesty in this blog and although you may not completely agree, this is how I personally feel, so please do not judge.

To begin, I have had many people ask me “WHY” and that is simple, I had a friend who competed in 2010 and after seeing her pictures and reading her story; I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I only really got into athletics as an adult as I suffered from pretty bad asthma as a child and used it as an excuse. A fitness competition was a chance to train, learn good nutrition and I was only dependant on myself (or so I thought-more on that later). I wanted the challenge, the commitment and to finally be proud of my body.

I got in touch with that friend to see how she did it and she gave me the name “Lisa Dardis", a lifestyle coach who has helped MANY women get to the stage through nutrition planning, counselling, training and just overall support. Lisa has been pushing me for a year to finally compete and I felt that I was finally ready to commit and go for it in 2012. I would suggest that anyone wanting to compete should contact Lisa for help and advice. http://www.schirokhardbodies.com/

On January 28^th, 2012 I began my 16 week journey to the stage. The plan was: get to the gym 4-5 days a week, drink at least 4L of water every day and eat 6 full meals a day consisting of carefully portioned servings of protein, carbs and fruit or vegetables based on that week’s plan from Lisa. I weighed and measured myself every Saturday morning so that Lisa would know what adjustments were needed for the next week. The last week of the diet was insane with meals consisting of only chicken and cucumber and days of drinking 7, 6 then 5 L of water. This “plan” is NOT what everyone has to do to change their lifestyle and get in shape, this is specific for Competition, however, the premise is still the same, consistent physical activity and clean eating.

Well, after 16 weeks prep, competition day was here and as I am sure most of you know I did not even come close to finishing where I wanted. Over the last month, I have gone back and forth on why this was from blaming the judges to full out personal pity and “woe is me”. I recently received my stage photos and feedback from the head judge and the answer became crystal clear, I was not fully prepared either mentally or physically for the show and that is on me and me alone. I was EXTREMELY nervous, not confident with my posing and although I trained hard, it was not hard enough and it showed with my arms not being as sculpted as they should have been and my butt and legs still too soft.

Now for the honesty and reality of it................

No matter how much I told myself that this was my journey and up to only me, it was not true! There was another person involved that I failed to get 100% on board from the beginning.......my husband. I got some push-back when I first talked about competing and decided to go forward on my own whether he was on board or not and that is the #1 mistake that cost me in the end because it put a sour spin on the competition for him and I did not have the full support and understanding of the one person who I needed the most.

This meant that for 16 weeks I felt guilty about being out of the house, missed additional posing practice and support opportunities with a great bunch of ladies, woke up at 4:30am to get to the gym and home again before he woke up, which meant added stress and work-outs that were not as affective. I avoided split training (2 gym sessions in one day) even though there were a few weeks that I should have been doing this to ensure the proper amount of cardio and weight training was accomplished. It also meant that I would come home to a pizza sitting on the counter or get frustrated about him questioning my salt or carb intake (or lack thereof) because he didn’t understand the diet- again, more stress. And most of all, I didn’t have someone holding me accountable and offering support when I didn’t feel like going to the gym or grabbed a cookie out of the cupboard. I was able to cosistently stick to my diet plan only because the majority of my meals were eaten at work. After the show, I went through a period where I blamed him along with everyone else, but it still comes back to me and my communication to him so it is not fair to put that burden on him. He came to the show to support me and now that he knows what it is all about and what is needed to compete, I know that he will be my number one supporter should I attempt this again.

Yes, I do know that I did great in only 16 weeks losing 13+inches overall (3.5 of that off my butt, thank you very much! LOL), cutting my body fat % by 9%, losing 12lbs of fat and gaining almost 7lbs of muscle. I don’t want to say that I regret doing the show, but I wish I had done pretty much everything a little differently........ For those of you that know me well or have played on a team with me, you know first hand how hard I am on myself and this time it was amplified as it was only my mistakes that cost the "game". I know that stepping on that stage was a huge accomplishment and for some that is enough (and I truly commend you), however, that is just not how I am built. Way too competitive. LOL! So, for the past month I have been plagued with an EXTREME (almost unbearable) disappointment in myself and major guilt that I let my friends, family and coach, Lisa, down. I have been watching as all my hard work slowly goes down the drain, feeling powerless to stop it (even though rationally, I know better). I have had no desire to go the gym since the competition and I have been eating just okay, but not even close to as clean as my body deserves. I am slowly getting back on track mentally which is needed before I can get back on track physically.

I don’t share this to look for sympathy or to continue on my “woe is me” path, I share this as part of me changing my thought process going forward and maybe helping others who are thinking of competing or just changing their lifestyle to a healthier one.

I know that I am the only one that can change my way of thinking and I need to look forward to the goals I want to achieve, not back on the ones I didn’t quite reach.

For those of you wondering how you can change your life, get in shape, lose a few pounds and just be healthy, I will also be posting my advice to you shortly.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story, hopefully it aids you in someway on your own fitness journey.

C U SOON!

Jen

Commit to Self, Commit to Health!